Emergence Point

2006-11-24

[note: they were talking both about my personal emergence point and everyone's emergence point]

(MFGH) there is a "beginning point" in your consciousness… an "assemblage point" if you will…that is the most "core you"… or rather, the most central point of your point of view…it has the quality of perception, of distinguishing itself from what it is perceiving… the origin of duality… the origin of "reality" and then experience over time… [hubby adds: the origin of the experience of "self."]

for each of these points, the beginning is like a little "big bang"… and at the beginning of each point of view is the pattern that represents the truth about that place/time… the "DNA" of that being, on a metaphysical level…

you did not choose where you were in the Greater Body of God… but you chose when you were--when you emerged…and so your responsibility is not in your essence, but in your original "decision" to emerge as a separate entity… and this decision can be understood by understanding the story of the Greater Forces up to that point…

there is always an original judgment there… even if it is only "time for Me-ness"… but most commonly, it was in reaction to what had happened up to that point…

the decision that you made, that we talked about before… is key to understanding you experience, since that time… to be Heart, before Heart emerged, before the function of Heart could be in place, before it was manifested by the making love of the parental parts… is the conundrum that you have been trying to understand…

in fact "you" go back to the virtual reality of Original Heart… you/y'all/We thought we knew what would happen in the experience of separating, but we did not know… we were the ultimate in inexperience, without even knowing that there was a distinction called "experience" that had a cumulative effect on the being of an entity…

in Original Heart there was no imprinting, experience was always fluid and could always be "reset" to zero… the history of what went before was not damaging, in the ways it is in manifestation… and this is the great mistake that God made for so very long… not even realizing that this was his core assumption about reality, that there were no consequences, which made it so very hard for him to understand the Mother's experience…

So in your "metaphysical DNA" is the history of Everything that led up to your decision to emerge… and your being is the Manifestation, the Birth of that history… you were reflecting to the Universe "this is what you get if you were to Create at this moment in time from this place in the Body"… you were Information to the Cosmic Evolutionary Path. Feedback.

But you did not really know what it would be to Experience life as that manifestation. You did not foresee the consequences of emerging then, any more than we did in the very beginning. Many of you have felt that you made a terrible mistake… that your original decision was wrong, since you have had so much pain as a "consequence" of it.

But you need to forgive yourself there. We all have experienced pain; there was no emergence point that would have been better for you, that would have allowed you to escape the pain, or prevent the pain. You did not do it wrong.

Yes We have judged it as wrong, so there is a reason that you have felt guilty… but We are releasing this fundamental judgment against you, as we are releasing it against ourselves.

A huge part of Us has felt that we never should have manifested in the first place, when we split Original Heart… We have felt that the pain was not worth the outcome… We have had very angry parts of ourselves…

yet the irony is there is literally no one but ourselves to "blame." If we are parental (and ultimately, everyone can trace their path back to Original Heart), we have to own that we made the decision… out of Love…

What a horrible/beautiful understanding… it is almost beyond comprehension, if you are to embrace the totality of what happened… in fact it has been beyond comprehension, as we did not see the role of denial or understand the manifestation of the Gap… our core identities were not able to comprehend what our consciousness was denying…

Nor did we understand that the Void had a kind of "reversal-consciousness" that would be disturbed by Manifestation… that would give rise to the Smack… the asuras that want only to get out of the trap of Manifestation and return to an un-manifest state… and would kill everything to do this.

The participation of this denial energy in the history of creation has not been seen clearly, either. It has "aligned" with every impulse to deny, push away, or kill another and given it the quality that you call "evil"… this is the Shadow of Manifestation itself… the "cost" of manifesting, so to speak… disturbing the Void and mixing asuras into manifestation...

again, this is a question of right place. when the gaps are healed, then this energy can go back into the void, outside of Us… we won't be giving it a place among Us…

So. This is just part of the lesson, just the background. What you did in particular to end up with bipolar is your own personal story in relation to all of this. How do you think it fits together?

(me) well I am kind of going off of what you said before, that I made the decision to embrace the polarities as they were without much heart presence to mitigate their extremes or integrate them. That makes the most sense to me. I am not quite sure how this translates to the Indigo experience yet. I have been trying to understand that part for a long time. I have put it as "how did I get from the bottom of Yellow up to Indigo? How did I emerge at both places at once?"

(MFGH) well to put it simply, you embraced these two polarities. But first we have to understand who the "you" is that embraced this.

There are many, many branches of Heart. You could almost take any two points along the spectrum and find a Heart Presence trying to balance the two. They do not all gather "in Green" so to speak. Indigo is the Heart between Purple and Blue. Orange is the Heart between Yellow and Red. And heart positions resonate with other heart positions.

There is also the Heart presence between any two Main Parts—your hubby is the perfect example of this, trying to balance Body and Heart. There are aspects of diety that are between Spirit and Heart, Will and Heart, Will and Body, Spirit and Body... Do these have a color? no, not exactly. But they have resonances with the issues in other "heart" colors.

But your emergence point of view was actually previous to the manifestation of the Rainbow. The Lens to break up the light hadn't quite emerged yet. (Form.) So your point of view did not get a physical form until the Heart Daughters manifested. That was the closest form to you.

And this also goes back to Original Heart. The beautiful forms manifesting colors beneath the lens of FOM's gaze was a virtual experience there that was very pleasing and much anticipated as a manifestation out in Reality. So it was not wrong. But the consciousness in and from Original Heart did not anticipate the Mother's point of view or experience there. We had no way to deal with it, let alone know it in the totality of our being.

So yes, you feel Parental to the Daughter Hearts… in that you had a self-organizing consciousness that preceded many other emergence points. This is part of why you have felt so responsible for the Daughters' gaps. In your OOOC imprinting, you felt that you were causal to the gaps between the Original Parents, as you did not bridge them, you did not keep your "parents" together, and this original gap was parental to many of the other gaps. And from another point of view (Original Heart's), your "parents" are more like your children, so there is yet another layer of responsibility.

The Godchannel has not focused on this Original Guilt, as that has not been my mission there. I have wanted to give voice to not-guilt, to help people balance out the terrible voices that have been plaguing them since before the beginning.

But these feelings must be addressed, and particularly by people in your position. The gift of guilt here is helping you to get in touch with your "responsibility"—and thus your Power.

(me) thank you.