Note: this post builds on the previous one.
2006-12-02
(me) Dear MFGH,
I am so worried about not vibrating. I am also worried about sustainability… my personal impact on the planet. [Discussion of a meeting with a friend.] I feel peaceful right now and don't want to mess with it. So am I a hypocrite or what?
(MFGH) Coming into alignment with your values, goals, and shoulds is one of the fundamental issues for humanity, especially for you generation. You have not known how to do this in a nurturing way with lasting results. Can you feel your intent?
(me) yes, and I am getting that there is a certain degree of certainty that I will take the actions necessary that needs to be there… or maybe it would be better to say there is a certain quality to it that when it is there, lets me know that I can count on myself… a felt commitment…
(MFGH) it is not something that can be faked. And it is not something that can be forced. You have to be "ready" for it, which has a component of going through steps over time, but also, there is a non-linear component of freedom-to-choose—
(me) I am getting the image of a big vertical spiral, like those Christmas lawn ornaments made out of white lights in the shape of trees—
(MFGH) the freedom to choose requires you to be able to access that part of your will that makes the choice… in your image it would be below the spiral… when you are there, you are in touch with your power to create your own reality…
(me) is this like what I got in touch with with the Werner Erhardt workshops?
(MFGH) yes, and… the way they got there was through emotional manipulation as well as the cognitive deconstruction…
It is more loving to get there through emotional movement and judgment release… this is the spiral process, that keeps winding around your issues, but at a deeper level each time… until you have the "aha" that shows you how you were manifesting reflections of what you were holding, denying, and judging.
(me) I am getting that I can stop the process by drinking or other addictive behaviors, by denial…
(MFGH) yes and habits need to be looked at as well. Habits on all levels: habits of body, habits of thought, habits of feeling, even habits of heart. Habits of holding and circulating your energy.
Part of the reason that people put brakes on the process is because "sliding down" does not look like a good idea. You generally want to go "up."
You also support each other to go up or down in relationships. This can be done in more manipulative ways, or with a lighter touch. Interventions, for example try to get people to "hit bottom"… to "get" that their behavior is causing problems in their life… and to "make the choice" to get help for it.
(me) I feel like my meds keep me from going down. And going up for that matter. And getting tangled up in the branches.
(MFGH) you could look at the spirals themselves as another form of the "ring of Grace" that we talked about recently. In fact a spiral is a better image in some ways, because it has the third dimension—depth. Grace can lead you down, and it can also lead you up. It depends on where you "need" to go next on your path.
This also gets to the issue of your "scared and angry drowning will" and whether it needs the light or not.
Basically, the question is, how can we reconcile Grace with death? How can We even claim there is such a thing when there is so much suffering? "Amazing Grace" was written on a slave ship, after all…
(me) I have always thought that he felt grace because he had all of that will-polarized essence below him drawing it down…
(MFGH) yes. Because of this kind of scenario, and for the uncountable other reenactments of abuse, the will (for the sake of simplicity I will talk about it as if it is one thing) has decided that it can't trust the light and has to heal itself without any help.
The kernel of truth in this is that the will has to lead the healing process. But there is no way around it, the will needs the light to heal. And this goes both ways. The light needs the will to reflect its "lovingness-quotient," not to mention to have a place to expand into, not to mention have the capacity for feeling.
Neither can exist without the other, and the existence without the other is hardly worth living.
Grace is the guide to the "uniting path"—the next step for the will side to find the light and the spirit side to find the will.
Now let us turn that "beam of Grace" around and imagine that it is going the "other" direction… not just from Original Heart to the lost will, but also from the lost will to Loving Light. It is like those amazing photographs of a lightening strike before it has actually hit the Earth—there is a reaching out from both sides to make the connection. "Grounding" is not a passive activity.
In reality, that beam is going both directions. The OH to Will direction has been "stronger" up to now, but the Will to Loving Light direction is gathering momentum. This is the "picking yourself up by your own bootstraps" direction.
There has been confusion here for the will side because on the one hand it senses its capacity to—there is not a word for it in the English language—choose-loving-light-and-manifest-exactly-what-it-wants, which it does not "need" the light to do. However it needs the light to fulfill its function here.
An analogy would be reproduction. The mother does not need the father to grow the baby, her body is capable of this. But she needs the father in order to get pregnant.
However if the father sticks around and helps her meet her needs along the way, pregnancy will be a less stressful, more pleasant, and even joyous experience.
But in our analogy, the Father did not stick around for the Mother. So the will experienced single parenthood early on. And part of it said—"we don't need you. We can do it ourselves." While the other part said "I cannot do this alone! How can you expect me to help myself here?"
And there has been an argument in the will side ever since. And especially over how the will should approach the light. As a "supplicant?" Or as a "demander?"
Both sides need to find a middle ground. The will does have some power here. There is so much to say about how this has been damaged and what it will take to fix it that we will not try to sketch it out. You have a very detailed understanding of this already.
The point we want to make is that this is a goal—to strengthen the "Mother's beam"—although beam is too yang of a term. Maybe the Mother's "vacuum tube." But a tube that outreaches.
This is MotherHeart, essentially.
(me) wow, I need a minute to digest…one thing that comes to mind is that there must be a FatherHeart… which is where husband is I suspect.
(MFGH) Yes.
(me) thinking about my "bipolar OC" when I made the decision to include all before they had connected… the reaching to the Spirit side seems to be the outreach.
(MFGH) Yes.
(me) I am also getting something about wormholes… that they are manifestations of the Mother's vacuum tube…
(MFGH) that is a simplification of it, but fine for now.
(me) I am also getting a "psychic vampire" connection… someone who "sucks the life out of you" has too much of that and not enough of the Grandfather side or something.
(MFGH) yes… if a person is not following the stream of Grace from Grandfather, they are going to be drawn to any light they "see." Guilt has a role to play here. The person who is giving them light usually has guilt for having more light. In fact they aren't connecting with their "own" MotherVacuumTube.
(me) I guess that is why my mediation helps me so much—I am connecting up the two beams.
(MFGH) yes and hopefully this will give you some more consciousness about the nature of the two sides.
(me) but I also feel that there is essence, not a "vacuum" involved.
(MFGH) yes, this is where the metaphor falls down. It isn't really a vacuum. There is essence. The essence is magnetic. We are talking the force of gravity here. But the force of gravity with a direction to it. More that just a mass attracting anything in it's sphere.
It's what keeps the atoms together. In some ways it is still a mystery to your science. It's a "given."
(me) and vibration has something to do with it.
(MFGH) yes. Each swing of the electron, from one side to the other, creates a tiny vacuum that draws things in. And then the question is, where does the atomic particle get the energy to vibrate? That is the light's contribution.
(me) Is this what the GodChannel is calling "Desire?"
(MFGH) yes. It is magnetism with intent. It is a very powerful, and much underrated force.
It works in conjunction with "dreams," as in having a dream about your future and making it come true. This is where Indigo gets involved.
(me) yes I have a sense of the feedback loop. (Indigo projects the vision, and then sees what is actually happening, and gives this information back to the other chakras.) And I am getting that Grace is or could be involved in this loop.
(MFGH) yes, this is why opening the third eye is so important. What you are opening to, is Grace.
(me) ??? what about all the horrible pictures that people see?
(MFGH) Grace "demands" that these be seen and communicated and responded to.
(me) but what about hallucinations? What is happening to my poor bipolar and schizophrenic brothers and sisters?
(MFGH) this is another—or rather an additional—issue. These problems need straightening out. And Grace can help with this.
We need the "Mother's Side" (the Mother Vacuum Tube) to come from these individuals to help us help them. But the structure to do this is messed up. The first and second attentions are collapsed. [Note: there is more about this elsewhere.]
When this is happening, it can be hard to follow the stream of Grace from either side. Experienced movers can do this.
You can help by working on your stuff. You are an aspect of MotherHeart, as in the Original Tube, and have responsibility for creating the Form that is dysfunctional here.
(me) Holy Crap.
(MFGH) If you keep following your own streams of Grace, you will do fine.
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